The trouble with vacation

I love going on vacation but I hate staying in hotels. I am super picky. I even did a search for bed bugs when we went down to Disney world. In fact the first hotel we were staying in had reports of bed bugs. I spent the entire flight down there searching for a new hotel, without the bugs, and canceling my existing one. If you have ever been to Disney world you'll understand this is quite a feat, the place is crawling with miniature blood sucking insects.

So I'm always interested in going away with Robbie for the weekend. To the dells, Chicago or another close by retreat. I always start my search thrilled for adventure and end up walking away disgusted. It turns out for me the more romantic a hotel is the grosser it becomes to me. Like sybrisis. It's this fancy romantic getaway around here with pools in the bedrooms and everything. At first you think hey that's awesome lets stay there. Then the more you look into the more twisted your expression becomes,they rent the room for the afternoon?! This cozy retreat becomes a crabs infested cesspool. All the walls have to be covered with sperm. I don't care how well the maids clean, how much bleach is dumped in the washer, or how chlorinated the pool is that does not come out fully. Period.

The one exception I can make is sundara. Here's why, it's a spa, they got a lot of cleaning products, and most people go with girlfriends. May be its the fact that the beds are so comfy but I can stay there. I just won't black light it.

The good news is this makes my bed look ever so much more comfortable. The bad news is I never seem to remember my feelings and ill end up searching again.

Lets all buy a vacation home together. We can have our own rooms and there's no crazy stuff allowed in the public areas? That could work.